Draft Magazine Feed: We’re buying a beer for… the Somalian pirates
Let’s get this straight: These pirates off the Somalian coast saw a Ukrainian freighter ship, highjacked it, and then found out it was loaded with weapons worth $30 million? Really? Actually, it turns out that’s exactly what happened.
“We just saw a big ship,” the pirates’ spokesman, Sugule Ali, told The New York Times. “So we stopped it.” Then said pirates realized it was loaded with tanks, artillery, grenade launchers and everything short of suitcase nukes Jack Bauer spends his days chasing.
That has to be either the best luck of all time or the worst. If we were pirates — not for Halloween, like actual, Captain Jack Sparrow pirates — we would imagine a ship full of weapons would be an ideal bounty… right up until the entire free world started paying attention, decided you couldn’t have them, and that, oh while they were at it, maybe they should do something about the pirating on the high seas in general.
So, yo ho, yo ho. Drink up me ‘earties. The next round’s on us, guys.
(Finally, how great is it that the pirates have a spokesman?)
